Uncertain Fruit

Nearly ten years of failed fertility trials, our arms held the newborn that we were adopting. Every second that we were with him, we were more convinced that he was ours to keep.

It turns out he wasn’t. In the world of adoption, it’s known as a reclaim when the birth mother changes her mind. While she reclaimed the baby that she relinquished to our care, we had to reclaim our life.

From our distinct voices, this dual memoir explores our loss, the subsequent unraveling of the life we knew in small town Vermont, as we pack up our belongings, and move from our home into a 24 foot RV in Florida. We address how feelings of betrayal and grief sneak into every layer of your life and your past, from recognition of sexual identity to unrequited love, from miscarriage to the end of marriage. What bursts forth from all of these experiences is what we call Uncertain Fruit, based on Sonnet 2 from May Sarton’s Autumn Sonnets.

 

I Miss Mom…Already

History does repeat itself, no matter how hard I try to stop it!

My grandmother had dementia and now my mom is succumbing to its entanglement in her mind. Come with me as I travel through both our lives and see how alike and different our paths have been, and continue to be.